Opening The Next Door
Have you been willing to notice, there comes a time when pushing harder simply stops working? Even though we can justify things, “Didn’t sleep well last night.” “Don’t feel good today.” Our bodies tell us. Our emotions tell us. Sometimes life itself tells us. A friend and I were discussing this this morning, when we allow ourselves to see – so much shows up.
Yet many highly accomplished people continue living according to an internal operating system that was built decades ago. Produce. Perform. Accomplish. Take care of everyone. Keep moving. Don’t slow down. But what if this stage of life requires something entirely different?
Our physical needs change. The body may require more recovery, movement, sleep, nourishment, pleasure, touch, sunlight, laughter - and far less chronic stress. Not because we are becoming weak but because the body is asking us to listen differently. Haven’t you noticed after decades of good health that all of a sudden, cholesterol, blood pressure, and sugar are not just things “old people” talk about but you as well?
Our emotional needs change also. We may have less tolerance for superficial relationships. Less willingness to keep proving ourselves. Less desire to spend precious time with people who exhaust us. We may want intimacy. Honesty. Friendship. Play. Belonging. And peace.
Then there are our spiritual needs, the ones we can ignore for years while building a career, raising children, and creating a life.
Why am I here?
What matters to me now?
What still calls me?
What have I not yet expressed, created, experienced or given?
And perhaps the most provocative question:
If I no longer need to prove that I am or can be successful, who might I choose to become? We have been taught to prepare financially for aging. Perhaps we also need to prepare emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Not simply for retirement but for aging as well.
For aliveness. There is an enormous difference between creating a life that is comfortable enough to live out and creating one we are excited to wake up to.
Your needs have changed. Perhaps you have changed. The question isn’t whether you can continue living the way you always have. You probably could.
The more interesting question is: Why would you - if something within you is asking for more? Life is so very short, I pray we all live it fully whatever that means to each one of us. Don’t go through the motions, stop and assess – what would be ideal now? What would allow the sides of you you haven’t explored yet flourish? What interests? What trips? What talents do you want to develop or even play with? Go for it!
