The Five Faces You Wear Without Realizing It
My Self-Assessment Leadership Tool is over 10 years old now. Life passes quickly I dare say. I developed it after years of watching folks questioning their skills simply because they had their own style, one that worked for them even though it wasn’t the “norm,” whatever on earth that is.
The truth is you don’t just have a leadership style… you have a unique pattern of being. Every one of us is different, thank God. (How often have you looked at your brothers and sisters and wondered how you all could have grown up so differently in the same house? Yet you did.) My mother used to call us “the five points of a star” because we were all so different – and yet alike.
Beyond a unique pattern of being, every one of us defaults to a particular style under stress. That style brings strengths - and predictable blind spots. The secret is in recognizing them.
Here is a very brief introduction to the system I’ve created based on what I’ve seen:
The Thinker: clarity and creativity are natural, but s/he can disconnect when in defense.
The Team Leader: strong ability for connection but can be smothering when in fear.
The Supporter: Loyal, giving, and hard worker but goes to illusions of victim and powerlessness when overwhelmed.
The Visionary: Great advocate for your vision – makes things happen and provides inspiration but can go into control and intimidation when challenged.
The Organizer: Loves structure and organization but can be very rigid via right/wrong.
We each have all five but with an abundance in one or two primary styles. It is so clear that our greatest strength is often the doorway to our greatest vulnerability. Knowing when the switch is happening allows us to stop the process and regroup before the consequences become too high.
An important point to remember, with this is that we are not our styles, we are so much more. Our personalities consist of our strengths and vulnerabilities, our interests and yes so much more yet they are simply elements of who we are. We are all this plus… Because of that, every one of these styles can be strengthened, evolved, and balanced with self-awareness and effort.
Without an ounce of judgement, take a look at who you become under pressure? What do those closest to you experience when you’re not at your best? What do you experience?
Mastery is not changing your style, it’s becoming conscious within it and choosing to focus on the best of who you are while understanding and accepting the humanity in all of us, including yourself. Self-judgment serves no one. Self-awareness and personal growth support and inspire all of us. Go for it!
Here is a link to my Assessment Tool: https://askdrdorothy.com/assessment
